spectacles.

here you are yat,my new glasses!
warna brown.half frame.
first time aku pakai half frame.
selama ni pakai full frame.
this time mak aku pilihkan.
my previous glasses banyak kenangan.
sebab yang dulu ker0 pilihkan.
mak aku pun suka yang ker0 pilihkan dulu.
mak aku kata yg ker0 pilihkan tu wat aku nampak bijak.
haha.
dengan specs yang lama tu jugak aku tengok ker0.
kalau tak pakai specs tu,x nampak muka ker0.
dan jugak muka orang-orang yang aku sayang.
like my family.
like my best friends.
ko,mira,yana,sue,alin,ieqa,naz.
aku simpan specs lama sebab sayang.
im scared to let go my old memories yat.
i can't live without it.
i know ur scared to let ur old memories go too.
we're both scared.
but
we can't stop living right?
don't be afraid to take a step forward.
please be one helluva doctor that im proud of.
love u lots yat!

fun in the sun =)

I spent the first few waking moments of my day crying silently in bed.i pushed a knuckle to my eye to stop the tears from spilling out.the harder I tried,the more it came.what a way to start the day huh?suddenly all the memories came crashing back to me.the good ones.the bad ones.the silly ones.the funny ones.the angry ones.the jokes.the laughter.the tears.the pain.boy how were they sweet and bitter at the same time.all these memories connecting me to this one particular person who is so much like me in many ways.all these memories now bundled up in a sack and buried deep inside the back of my brain.all these memories come with a scar in my heart.

yeah nini.we know how u feel.enough with the small talk.we’re bored of it.hahah.

I got up.got ready.and headed out to the beach with mira.it was only the two of us.but it was fun all the same!there weren’t many people around as it was only the crack of drawn.plus it wasn’t the weekends.we arrived there in time to watch the sunrise.Subhanallah.cantik sangat.the sky was a forget-me-not shade of blue.teluk batik isn’t all that breathtaking compared to the other beaches I’ve been to.but it was a sight to behold.it made me content and very happy.we ate,we swam,we camwhored.we laughed.we sunbathed.we gossiped in the depths of the ocean.yat,yana,sue,alin,ieqa and naz.wish u guys were there too!i love u guys a lot. =) oh.not forgetting you-know-who.wish he was there. =(

I’ve been through a lot of pain lately.it made me learn that no one actually has the right to talk bad about others.especially not behind their backs.i fell down flat on my face.so now I learned my lesson.no more talking bad about other people.i’ll avoid it if I can.if I had a slip of tongue,I seek for Allah’s grace to change me into a better person.and people need to realize,things happen for a reason.

tummy feels full.

i just ate two whole baked potatoes with fish fillet.super full!Alhamdulillah for the food.see my tummy?as round as a bubble.hehe.i still have tons of work to do.mostly numec.EMD and thermo also adds up to the workload.so much to do.so little time.its only 11pm but im feeling drowsy already.im blogging for fun tonight.nothing much to say.im tired of denying things.deny this deny that deny again and again and again.but in the end no one cares anyway.cuz no one actually knows whats in my heart.they dont know the real truth.the real story of how it has been only two months plus since the you know what.it is almost impossible for me to find a replacement in that amount of time.im not that kind of girl.so i tell myself.nini.just shut up.its for ur own good.no use denying.it'll die down eventually.nini nini.u've been through alot these past few years.when will all this nonsense stop? =)

droopy eyes.

im sleepy already.but i have so much work to be done!nini.don't complain.it's ur own fault.facebook is all u know of now nowadays.sikit-sikit bukak facebook.bodoh punya facebook!facebook is a distraction!it should be banned!and i need to have more self control!i hate not having anyone to take care of me!benci benci benci!i used to be okay without facebook around! >.<

ok.enough with the whining.im here to talk about the family living next door to my home back in manjung.after having them as my neighbour practically all through my life,i can proudly say that they are neighbours delivered especially to my family from the heavens above.they are by far the best neighbours a family can have!i love them to bits like my own family.this family have watched me grow up from this hyperactive,tree climbing,super selekeh,rambut kembang little girl to being a not-so-graceful young lady of twenty one.bayangkan.they have been my next door neighbour since i was seven.thirteen years and still counting.they have been with my family through thick and thin.in sickness and in health.during the happy times and sad times.weddings and funerals.this is the main reason why i hate living in big cities.u barely even know ur next door neighbour.Nabi pernah cakap ur life wouldn't be complete without good neighbours or something like that.so when i get my own house,i would want to find neighbours like them.susah senang sama2. =)

august people.

This is a study done by the renowned Dr. Fazilah Kamsah,that famous motivator dude that's on ur TV screen every morning before the crack of dawn about the personalities of people born in certain months.i myself kind of think that people born on certain months behave in a somewhat similar manner.each month has their own trademark personality.for example,i noticed that August people are hot tempered and gets angry easily.and to me,october people are just complicated.hahaha.kidding.i noticed that most October people are pretty private and prefer keeping their feelings or thoughts to themselves.the focus here is the month of August which is the month in which i was born of course!so here goes.most of the stuff listed below actually DOES apply to me.except a few.especially the sopan santun part.ewww.haha.

Result: OGOS

1.Suka berlawak
2.Mudah tertawan kepadanya
3.Sopan santun dan caring terhadap orang lain
4.Berani dan tidak tahu takut
5.Orangnya agak tegas & bersikap kepimpinan
6.Pandai pujuk orang lain
7.Terlalu pemurah & bersikap ego
8.Nilai harga diri yang sangat tinggi
9.Dahagakan pujian
10.Semangat ...juang yang luar biasa
11.Cepat marah & mudah mengamuk
12.Mudah marah apabila cakapnya dilawan
13.Sangat cemburu
14.Daya pemerhatian yang tajam & teliti
15.Cepat berfikir
16.Fikiran yang berdikari
17.Suka memimpin & dipimpin
18.Sifat suka berangan
19.Berbakat dalam seni lukis, hiburan & silat
20.Sangat sensitif tapi tidak mudah merajuk
21.Cepat sembuh apabila ditimpa penyakit
22.Belajar untuk relax
23.Sikap kelam kabut
24.Romantik, pengasih & penyayang
25.Suka mencari kawan

brunch.

i woke up with a smile today.on any other day,i would wake up with a frown,thinking how bad that day would get.but not today folks.not today.i appreciate being at home too much.i am a true home person.

but.my smile didn't last long.as i was lying there staring at the blank ceiling trying to get the mood to actually heave myself up to go brush my teeth,i remembered that today is monday.i remember what he does on mondays.monday mornings to be exact.yesterday he felt so close to me.but today,he'd be back to where he always goes on weekdays.so again,i am left alone like i always do.told u.it doesnt take much for my smile to disappear.a simple thought like that can only shatter my happiness and take my smile away so easily.time.the ultimate cure to heartbreak.im sick of clinging to time for help.i wish there was a willy wonka pill that can make time go faster or a potion that can cure heartbreak in an instant.i know my pain isn't as great as any other.but it's still pain.pain is just plain painful.

Anak Raja Dua Serupa...

was the title of the theatre slash makyung performance that i watched on the twenty third of january at istana budaya.it was my first time watching a show in IB [jakon kan?].to be frank,i understood only two thirds of the show as they were speaking in rapid kelantanese.this is what happens when u sit in between two non Kelantanese people.no offense to alin and naz!but it was a hell lot of fun!i enjoyed myself immensely.it would be MORE fun if i brought mummy along to be my personal translator.only then i would understand the entire show.hehe.however,i lost my voice at the end of the show.i laughed too much.like i always do.haha.

here goes the storyline.it tells the tale of two twin princes called..emm.wait.lemme think.ahha!oops.i lost it.wait.haa!dah ingat!Alam Kesuma and Iras Kesuma.Alam Kesuma is the younger twin.he got kidnapped by the pirate king when he was a young chap.so the story grows from this simple plot.it grew and grew and grew until it became one helluva story.a story with a happy ending of course!yay!nice one nini.ur VERY good at story telling.*clap clap*.i like the dude who acted as Iras Kesuma.he is the only male Pakyung in the whole of malaysia [i guess so].i kinda thought makyung is supposed to be for girls ONLY.the name itself is MAKyung [hello like duh?].he proved me wrong when i looked at him dance.it was soft.but manly at the same time.how can someone be soft and manly at the same time!?its just wrong dude!but he made it look right.think u can do it?try.

home

there are some things in my life that aren't going as smoothly as i hoped it would.but im happy,thankful and satisfied all the same.im happy to be at home.just me,mummy and baba.being the only child again for one more week is something that i need crucially in my life right now.i need all the attention i can lap up from my parents to mend this so called "broken heart".aside from my friends,being at home is something that's keeping me truly happy for now.im sick of bleeding.im tired of getting hurt.im sick of falling down day by day.im sick of trying to pick up the pieces and putting them back together again,only to find it shattered again the day after.im sick of crying.im sick of talking back.im sick of getting angry.so sick of talking about people and people talking about me.im just so sick of everything.there are others who are suffering even worse things than i am right now.but the weight is just too heavy to carry by myself.i still need to learn many lessons in life.

im twenty one this year.people like to call this age "the year of freedom".why?well.basically it means that ur entering an important phase in ur life called adulthood.to the people of the west,they prefer to put it this way : when u turn twenty one,the chains linking u to ur parents' rule are broken.so basically u can drink ur ass off without a care in the world or u can do whatever whenever u want at absolutely anytime.have sex anywhere anytime and any place.no parents to tell u to do this or that.i mean hypothetically u basically throw ur parents away.but to us humble people from the east,no matter what age u are,u aren't cut short from ur duties to ur family especially ur parents.the older u get,the bigger ur responsibilities.so what im trying to say here is.im proud to be brought up with such family values.nice and easy.

it's still not too late to wish myself a happy new year.happy new year princess!this year started out great.today is the twenty fifth day of january.it has been two months and nine days.still counting.im still living.im still breathing.im still smiling and sometimes laughing.all thanks to a bunch of crazy cool friends and my lovely family.Alhamdullillah.